The Right Friends Make the Difference

You Are Who You Surround Yourself With

Everyone aspires to be successful and live a better-than-average life. Unfortunately, not everyone actually follows through with their aspirations. Just like there are many paths to success, there are also many complexities which determine how successful we become. One aspect that I have talked a lot about is goal setting. Another important and determining factor of success is who we choose to associate with.

Are Your Friends Helping Or Hindering Your Success?

Since I’ve been a little kid, I have had big aspirations. I have also always wanted to take my friends along with me on my journey to success although I never considered whether they were having a positive or negative effect on my goals until recently.

Who we choose to surround ourselves with can have an enormous impact on who we become and how we live our lives. I am not talking about just from a business sense either – the right people can have a tremendous impact on your life in every way.

Before I moved to Arizona, about a year ago, I was doing a lot of partying and hanging out with people who weren’t helping me reach my goals. Basically, I used to surround myself with people on the sole basis of if they were “fun” to hang out with. When I moved to Arizona, I had the chance to start fresh. I now only hang out with my best friends (and luckily, business partners) Matt and Josh.

A Lot Can Be Accomplished In A Short Time

Many people who know me probably would say I am a “hard worker.” The fact is I haven’t always been a hard worker. In actuality, only since I’ve started my blog have I started to see any bit of success at all. By surrounding myself with like-minded and similarly focused people, I have been able to make incredible progress, both personally and through our businesses.

When all of your influences are motivating and positive, you will be amazed how much energy you have to work hard to be successful. Surround yourself with the right people and a lot can be accomplished in a short amount of time.

Pain Before Pleasure?

Most people around my age (early-twenties) spend a lot of time socializing and not otherwise using their time wisely. Once I started hanging around the right people, I realized that this is not how I wanted to live my life. I would rather sacrifice “fun” now by working hard now and be able to have the “fun” later. This is effectively known as living “pain before pleasure,” a saying that my best friend Josh swears by.

I think he is right. I know from personal experience – it’s easy to get caught up in a highly social and non-productive lifestyle. I chose to let go of relationships that did not better me as a person. Since then, I have been able to accomplish goals I would have never originally considered possible.

Surround Yourself With Similarly Passionate and Motivated People

There are many benefits to blogging, but one of the best is being able to surround yourself with like-minded people. There is a lot of power in talking regularly to passionate and motivated people. I have met a lot of great people through my blog who I chat with quite a bit including:

All of those people have been a great source of support and encouragement. They are all people I would have not known otherwise if I hadn’t been blogging.

Align Yourself With The Right People

My best friend and business partner Josh also recently touched on this subject in a post entitled You Are Who You Hang Around. Josh says:

The concept of surrounding yourself with great people in a business sense mirrors the lesson my parents taught me about friends. You will hear this concept mentioned often from successful business persons and leaders.

Surrounding yourself with the right people should be key for everyone, but it becomes especially crucial in the business world. Networking and associating with established business people who have experience can provide far more education than sitting inside a classroom. I have learned an incredible amount about business proceedings from one of my new business partners, Steve. One of the ways you’ll know if someone is the right person is when you find yourself challenged, growing and learning more because of that relationship.


Who Said That

As I said earlier, there are an unlimited number of paths to success and also unlimited complexities in becoming successful. I think it is very important to be constantly aware of some of the bigger aspects including goat setting and surrounding yourself with the right people. The right people are important not just from a business sense, but also from a personal one.

Have you guys had particular friends who have changed the way you live? A special business partner who somehow made it all happen? Write back and tell me about it.

32 thoughts on “The Right Friends Make the Difference”

  1. I couldn’t begin to tell you how harshly I have adhered to this belief ever since I left high school and moved away to University. Its good to know others out there are as sacrificial as I have been. It definitely hasn’t been easy saying ‘NO’ when it comes to being overly social and wanting to party like the rockstar I used to be in high school.

    1. Anthony, you are the man. I knew I was forgetting someone when making my online friends list. You have been a huge source of support for CarZi and encouragement for my other ventures. We will meet up and scheme soon, my friend.

  2. Birds of a feather flock together. Nate the mastermind that is developing and those bloggers are some of the most successful I have come across thus far on my journey online with a blog.

    I thought for sure that you had gone into my RSS feed and scooped them all up for your post.

    Oh, Nate your certainly the hard working type now. I will certainly be sharing your thoughts on this with my readers.

    Keep inspiring and sharing the blog success everyone.

  3. As usual an excellent post. I don’t believe that my friends are a positive influence. Thats not to say that they are a distraction from my work. I just find that they lack any passion for success in the way that I do.

    A few years ago I went into a bussiness-esque venture with some of them and learnt how true this was. The only person that I know that shares this passion is my twin brother, he is generally a great encouragement.

    Its hard to find like minded friends, anyone here have any ideas on how one would do so?

    Thanks, DP

  4. Nate, Great article. Very well written, and a very important topic that I have not really seen covered by anyone else.

    I see first hand on a daily basis the tangible and intangible benefits of having successful like-minded best friends.

    My business and mindset today has been heavily shaped and strengthened obviously by my like minded, very success oriented and hard-working business partner / best friend.


    – One answer to DP’s question – I really think you attract into your life what you most think about. I expect if you keep thoughts in your head of making some positive connections in your life… it helps attract the right people into your life. In my experience, synchronicities just seem to happen, as wacko new-agey as that sounds! We connected with Nate like that, and already are in business with him 🙂

  5. I love this article.

    Let me tell you about how this starts off VERY early in life. I was in a 5th grade classroom this past March. I overheard one of the girls telling one of the guys to think a little harder about who he hung out with on a regular basis. She spent some time gently trying to make him understand that once they got into middle school, some of the guys he was friends wiht might pull him away from teh right things and toward getting in trouble. She said it would only continue on into his life, his marriage, his jobs, etc.

    This, from a 5th grader. I was impressed that she was able to see things in such real and far-reading terms. The guy she was talking to took it quite seriously and I saw him make a progressive move to re-align his friendships. It causes quite a stir with his old crowd, causing a lot of hurt. But, he stuck to his guns.

    I can see him becoming a great MAN one day.

  6. I can’t agree more with you Nate. The more you surround yourself with likeminded people, the more you are motivates to succeed.

    Thanks, and you’re a huge resource for me too!!

  7. What an inspiring post – thank you! I especially liked Angie’s story about fifth graders learning this lesson (since I’m in education as well). My only question relates to your comment about “goat setting” in your concluding remarks. i’m not at all certain how one “sets” a “goat.” I’ve heard the expression “get one’s goat,” but how to SET it quite eludes me. Could you clarify?

  8. It all comes down to networking.

    One person can achieve 1X.
    Two people working together can achieve 10X.
    And if you can get a community working together, they can achieve anything.

  9. I have found this to be very true. Not just in the online world but offline as well. Find people that are more successful than you and befriend them. Find out what they do, how they do it, and why they do it. Success rubs off.

    I always hear people that aren’t successful saying about those that are, “they are just lucky.” Successful people aren’t just “lucky”. They were prepared and in the right mindset when opportunity presented itself. My associating with and befriending successful people you can learn how to be prepared when your opportunity comes.

  10. When I’m with forward-looking and positive-thinking people, I felt alive and full of hopes. The world is my oyster, everything is possible, nothing is too much of a problem. But when I’m with the nay-saying folks, I felt burdened because every opportunity is peppered with “What if”. Successful sees opportunity in every problematic situation. They ask how they can have the best of both worlds instead of giving up one option. They see themselves as bigger than their problem.

    People that are closest to me may not fit the bill. However, for things to change I must change first. I’m working towards a newer me that think positive, talk positive and act positive. Hopefully, that would inspired the folks around me to feel the vitality and excitement to go for a inner makeover.

  11. I have always heard that there are 3 types of people in your life. “Those that can help you, Those that can hurt you, and Those that make no difference.” Great post!

  12. Nate, can’t agree with you more too. But sometime, we just don’t realize that we can easily get lost if we don’t have a very strong value and attracting the wrong people to our life. This is a good read and good “reminder” also.

  13. Man you couldn’t have said it better. I did the same thing before by surrounding myself with people that are “fun” to hang out with.

    Now its just people that will help me reach my goals.

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